Being happy, being freeby Jane Twain on 11/20/15
I have always been researching for freedom and happiness. Sometimes aware of my aim, sometimes not. If only I have this, I would be happy. I kept thinking creating constant goals for myself. If only I travel there or achieve that, I would be free. The list was endless with always new things coming up as if being busy was the purpose of itself.
I would like to be clear from the start. Money gives you certain degree of freedom. It is an instrument which allows you time but also ability to do things you would not be able to otherwise. Having enough of it to live a normal life is important. It would create situations which could help you to be happy supporting your well being. You could eat good healthy food, have time to exercise and long sleep. Money is the tool and if used wisely it can create miracles.
For a long time I thought that having plenty of it was the solution to my problems. That it was the only thing I needed if I wanted to be free. If I had this amount, I would be content, only if I had that I would do this and it would be the beginning of endless happiness. It never did. It caused me to want more and more of the same thing. I felt lost questioning myself and meaning of my life.
Only a few months ago I realized that freedom as well as happiness are internal. They have little to do with outside situations, things and people. It is a state of mind. It is an outlook we have on life and emotions we experience. It is as simple as enjoying every day and taking pleasure in things, a walk on the beach, a taste of a meal or a small chat with some stranger. It is being healthy in your body and mind. It is also being aware of the options we have and creating goals for ourselves just for the sake of it.
Happiness does Not depend on the other people, on having luxury items or staying in an expensive hotel. How many times you heard stories of someone wealthy addicted to drugs or excessive drinking. How many times you heard of celebrities committing suicide or getting in trouble with poisonous relations or bad deals. Money can help but no way it is the only path to happiness.
I still remember a meeting with a wealthy Pakistani gentleman despite that it happened in 2012. He made an agreement to book my time for one week staying in a luxury two bedroom apartment near Dubai mall. A rather good looking man in his 40s, married with children. He gave me a huge amount of cash from a separate bag under his shoulder. I had no doubt that he was rich. Nevertheless he kept repeating during our time together that I should not adore him, that some people had much more money then he did, that despite all of this he had his problems too. Our philosophical discussions took much more time then psychical fun. He kept on studying "the research of happiness" reading to me laud, interpreting some sentences, asking me for an opinion. At that time I was not interested in that much, but with the years passed I was starting to understand his distress and the true meaning of this meeting.
Being free is being content with who we are now. It is living with life in balance enjoying activities in progresses. It does not mean that we should be happy all the time laughing like little children with no reason. This is carelessness and ignorance. True freedom means acceptance of sadness, distress, frustration and anger. All the emotions are part of us and should not be ignored. The oppositions match themselves like yen and yang. All parts of the same whole. All parts of the totality of life.
20 November 2015.