Setting the Stage
Preparation for any kind of sensual dance goes far beyond any typical notion of foreplay. It begins with the creation of a safe, nurturing, sensual space that will support opening of both me and you. In each subsequent stage of my ritual, you will be stepping deeper into the shared sexual altered consciousness. I will want the environment around us to enhance our experience. When visiting you in your hotel or home, I will therefore begin our Tantra ritual by preparing our space. I call my space "Jane Twain theatre of sexual and spiritual delights" because theatre encourages a variety of environments and performances.
The Stage is more then a bed. It is at least a room and may be an entire home. Bedroom is good, but it is not a must. I like to be creative and do ecstatic tantra in every room in the house (if you are inviting me into one). What if you have only one room? No problem. Almost all of the positions and practices can be adapted for small spaces.
The first step is clean up and tidy your space (do not worry, I will not be your housemaid). I personally think that cluttered space is psychically disturbing. Hide your computer and mobile phone. In Tantra, a computer screen or television for that matter is not a sex toy.
If it is an evening, I always turn off electric lights. I like to get back to basics: candles, candles and more candles. They flicker like starts and make everyone look beautiful and special. If you are in a hotel room, I will limit my candle obsession to a number of small once in mini containers. I also like to use meditation masala sticks (this is not obligatory).
Music is one of the most important parts of my Tantra ritual. The keys to choosing music are rhythm and flow. Does it make you move? Is the music energy building or is it relaxing? Does the music relax your shoulders? Does it make you move your hips? I will play both slow and soft music as well as slightly upbeat tune in our play.
Which toys to use (and whether to use them at all) is a matter of personal taste. In my soft domination & bdsm rituals I like to include both soft and hard sex toys as well as selection of vibrators. In the end, it does not matter so much which toys I use but how you consciously experience them. Traditionally tantra toys tend to be softer, for example, feathers, satin, massage oils, even fruit or chocolate. Toys are not the focus of Tantra, they are tools - just like breath, movement, imagination and sound.